In Exchange for My Soul

If we are to be true to the holiday’s original purpose, Christmas should be a time of reflection about the birth of our Savior. Likewise, New Year’s is often a time when we make resolutions about how we will conduct ourselves in the upcoming year. This past year has been a very good one for me in many ways. At almost 56 years old, for the first time in my life I’ve felt like on a day-to-day basis my work is consistently rewarding emotionally and spiritually. With few exceptions, I feel I’m doing good everyday playing my small part in trying to help children in my community by trying to help them get the services they and their families need. Certainly, there is work that pays more, but I have a hard time thinking of any other job as an attorney more worthwhile.

Also throughout the past year, albeit inconsistently and with many stops and starts, I’ve tried to make my prayers more meaningful and my thinking about the true meaning of the Gospel of Jesus Christ more honest and purposeful. I’ve tried to reflect upon the words of the Savior as written, without reading in words that are not there, or ignoring words that are. I’ve tried to be more discerning of the Savior’s true intentions for saying the words He said. I’ve tried to strip away years of preconceived or ill-conceived conclusions about the Gospel, both my own and those I’ve borrowed from others. This too has been very worthwhile.

For the New Year moving forward I want to focus and reflect on the words of my Savior, Our Savior, contained in Mark 8: 34-38:

And when he had called the people unto him with his disciples also, he said unto them, “Whosoever will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me. For whosoever will save his life shall lose it; but whosoever shall lose his life for my sake and the gospel’s, the same shall save it. For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul? Or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul? Whosoever therefore shall be ashamed of me and of my words in this adulterous and sinful generation; of him also shall the Son of man be ashamed, when he cometh in the glory of his Father with the holy angels.”

As I spend my time minute by minute, hour by hour, in the days and weeks and months ahead, I want to be more focused on what I am exchanging my time in this life for. Where have I misplaced my cross? What trivialities do I often spend my time in instead of more rewarding pursuits? What have I sought to gain from the world in exchange for my soul? How can I show I am not only not ashamed of His words, but strive more consistently to live by His example?

How can I save some meaning for my life?