Helping Struggling Families

I work as a family services attorney in a county juvenile court. There are two basic kinds of cases I deal with, those where the caregivers are not appropriately caring for the children and those where the children are behaving inappropriately. I use the work “appropriately” and “inappropriately” because of the wide range of circumstances families are in at the juvenile court, from curfew violations to the forcible rape of preteens.

For the cases involving parents not appropriately caring for their children, there are three categories; children who are neglected, children who are abused, and children who are dependent. Most people can readily understand the situations in which a child may be determined to be neglected or abused. A neglected child has caregivers who do not provide adequate clothing, food, medical care, etc. An abused child has caregivers who harm their children in a more direct way, such as by excessive discipline, exposing a child to illegal drugs in the womb, etc. A child who is dependent is not being appropriately cared for through no fault of the caregivers, through circumstances perhaps beyond the caregivers’ control. The example I typically give is of a single mother and young child when the mother is incapacitated, perhaps through a car accident, and there is no one else willing or able to care for the child. That child is dependent, and the State often will step in to provide care.

In the cases where children are behaving inappropriately, there are two kinds of cases, where the child is unruly and where the child is delinquent. An unruly child is one who doesn’t obey a rule specifically aimed at children, like by not going to school or obeying the parents’ rules as to when to be home. A delinquent child is one who violates a criminal law for which they could be prosecuted if an adult, like stealing, fighting, damaging other peoples’ property, etc.

Family services is always involved in cases of neglected, abused, or dependent children. Family services only gets involved in unruly and delinquent cases when either the child is removed from the home or it looks like the child may be removed from the home. Typically, a child will be removed from the home because the court determines the child cannot safely remain in the home, perhaps because the child is repeatedly running away or, often, because the child’s caregivers either cannot, or will not, stop the child from repeatedly engaging in extremely risky behavior.

My involvement as an attorney in this whole process is pretty limited. I, along with of others, including the Court, strive to make sure that children’s services follow all the rules set down by the legislature to protect families from the State inappropriately getting involved in their lives. All families struggle at times, only a small percentage warrant State intervention. For the State to get actively involved, those struggles must rise to a level where the State, in the best interests of the child, needs to take a more active role. The heavy lifting in helping struggling families is done by the families’ themselves, followed by the social workers, probation officers, and the service providers, thus counselors, therapists, mental health and medical professionals, etc.

In all cases in the juvenile court, the parents are parties to the case and part of the process, even if a child is unruly or delinquent. Just as parents inappropriately caring for their children effects the whole family, the unruly or delinquent acts of children effect the whole family. Although parents are always parties and part of the process in that attempts are made to notify them of all hearings, that doesn’t mean parents always participate. Very often either one or both of the parents fail to attend hearings for their children, and often the whereabouts of one or both of the parents is unknown, and sometimes even the identity of the father is undetermined. A grandparent, other family, or even family friend is often made a party to a case if that person is caring for the child in the parents’ absence, or if it looks like the child may be placed with such a person.

In the vast majority of cases of unruly and delinquent children, the home environment contributes to what is happening with the unruly or delinquent child. The proportion of responsibility between caregiver and child varies from case to case, but in almost all cases at least some responsibility lies with the caregivers and some with the child, even if the only responsibility with the caregiver is a lack of understanding on how to effectively deal with or monitor the challenges faced by the child. A positive resolution of the case almost always requires a change in attitude and behavior, not only in the child, but in the child’s caregivers.

The biggest red flag for me that a negative outcome is likely in a case is when either a caregiver or child refuses to take any responsibility for a negative home environment, or sees no reason to change their own attitudes or behaviors. No reason to learn, no reason to change, no reason to repent, no hope for a positive outcome.

Families’ struggle for many different reasons. Some of the most common reasons seen at the juvenile court involve drug addiction and/or untreated mental health issues. Another common reason is an intellectual impairment of a caregiver or child. Whatever the reason for the family’s struggles, the concerted efforts of both caregivers and child is almost always necessary for a positive resolution. Children do not raise themselves and do not create the circumstances into which they are born. Nor do children choose to have an intellectual impairment, or autism, or any number of other conditions. And caregivers often have difficulty caring for children because they themselves were cared for as children in a way which was far less than adequate. This is a cycle we hope to break.

The children today are the adults of tomorrow. It behoofs all of us to strive to provide all children with the best possible circumstance in which to grow into adulthood. One family at a time.